Most of the things we hear in our life time will be forgotten. As a person who talks for a living in some capacity, this makes me sad and relieved at the same time. I'm always trying to aim my words at my students. I always come back to the cartoon of the old man breaking a giant boulder by carrying a tiny hammer and hitting the rock in just the right spot.
I am at all times and until the day I die going to be aiming myself at helping students have a breakthrough on the mats. Not because this particular match, or tournament, or move is the priority, but the process of mastery goes on for forever.
Mastery will love longer than any word you or I ever say.
When I look at my life and all the pursuits I have attempted both successfully and unsuccessfully, I see that what I have been reaching for is the ability to control my experience and reach the pleasure of skill. Skill is a responsibility but it is also a pleasure. Being good at things feels good.
I think in 2018, too much is made of the "every kid gets a trophy" yada yada. We blame everything on that. I don't think thats the real problem. The real problem is that we don't give our kids time in a pursuit. We don't allow them the time it takes to develop mastery over something. Be it the violin, volleyball, whatever. Mastery takes time and structure to support it, just like a fragile tree sapling that could one day be an amazing tree.
When you get older, all the the things you tried won't matter, the things you have developed mastery over will.
Mastery takes time. So start now. Help your kids learn to master small things. When life gets more complex down the road, the process of breaking difficult challenges down into manageable steps will be hard wired into them.
This will never happen accidentally.